To Batman

"What is the purpose of this?" Damian asked, obviously disgusted by his surroundings.

Jason shot a look at Dick that was half “I told you so.” and half “How have you not killed this kid yet?”

"We told you, we’re camping." Dick answered helping Tim empty the SUV.

"Camping." Damian said kicking a pinecone with his boot. “Charming."

"You’ve never been camping before?" Tim asked as began to unpack one of the tents.

"I was left naked in the woods three hundred miles from home with just a knife and was expected to find my way back safely. Does that count?"

The other three men just stared at him, shocked by the deadpan way he had admitted it. To break the ice Jason chimed in. “I’ve never been camping before, slept outside a lot but never in the woods.”

Tim opened his mouth to ask why he would have been sleeping outside but Dick just shook his head and mouthed. “Don’t ask.” Tim wisely let it drop.

"So then what do we do?" Damien asked as he walked around watching the other men set up the camp. “One team hunts the other?"

Jason stopped his work and looked over at the youngest Robin. “Jeez kid what is wrong with you?”

Damian’s face grew red with frustration. “There is nothing wrong with me alley rat!”

A dangerous grin spread across Jason’s face as he began to stand. “Call me that again…”

Tim jumped between them, a hand on each other their chests. “Ok back off guys. You’re both pretty girls, we aren’t here to fight.”

"Then what are we here for?" Damian asked, half shouting.

"TO HAVE FUN!" Tim shouted back.

Dick’s laughter broke the tension as they all looked over at him. When he saw the other three Robin’s looking at him he held up a hand to give him a second to compose himself. “I’m sorry Tim but you sounded way too much like Bruce there for a moment.” He made his face overly serious as he did a startling good copy of their mentor’s voice. “WE’RE HERE TO HAVE FUN!!” He went back to laughing. “We’re here to relax and bond Damien.”

"Bond? he asked, one eyebrow raised in confusion.

"Bond in this case meaning sitting around a campfire and eating smores without killing each other." Tim said giving Jason a hard stare.

"Hey, I can live with that." Jason said holding his hands up in surrender. “Just make sure little Hannibal Lector over there watches his tongue."

"Or?" Damian challenged Jason.

Tim moved right into Damian’s face. “Or I swear to god you are going to wish you were three hundred miles away from home naked.” Damien looked like he was going to snap back with something but the look in Tim’s eyes discouraged him.

"What’s a smore?" he asked after a few seconds.

Tim took a few steps back. “I am going to side with Jason, what is wrong with you?”

Damian said nothing but if looks could kill Gotham would have had three less defenders.

Within an hour they had set up the camp, complete with tents and a roaring fire. Dick had set up a pot over the flame and was adding ingredients one by one as the other men talked. “So wait.” Tim was asking Jason. “You actually caught the coin in midtoss?”

Jason nodded as he took a drink of his coke. “Hand to god, I thought Bruce’s eyes were going to fall out but he didn’t say a thing. And I know nobody had ever touched Harvey’s precious coin.”

"Not true." Damian said inspecting the graham crackers with a skeptical eye. “I’ve touched his coin before."

Both Tim and Jason was looking at him with disbelief. Jason finally asked. “Oh yeah? What did you do with it then?”

"Shoved it up his left nostril." he answered not looking up. “It took three surgeries for him to be able to smell again." The camp was silent for a few seconds as they all just stared open mouthed at Damian.

Dick was the first to start laughing. “I would pay money to have seen that.”

Damien seemed upset at first, sure the other Robins were laughing at him but after a few seconds he realized they had found the story amusing. “I know father’s cowl has video, I am sure Oracle has it somewhere.”

"You know she has it as a screen saver!" Tim said, tears rolling down his cheeks as he tried to breath through his laughs.

"She hated Harvey!" Dick said shaking his head. “She said he always smelt like medicine and his bad eye freaked her out bad!"

Tim nodded excitedly. “I HATE that eye!!” he roared. “First time I saw it move I almost puked!”

They all enjoyed the image for a minute or so as the laughter died down. Damien finally asked Dick. “That smells good, what is it?”

"Hobo stew." Dick said proudly. “We used to live on this in the circus."

"Does it have real hobos in it?" Damian asked, his nose wrinkled in disgust. When the other three boys looked at him he shrugged. “What I can’t make a joke?"

Jason lost it first. “Dude you are SO Wednesday Adams!”

Damian didn’t get the reference but it was obviously not an insult.

"You’re an alright kid Damian." Jason admitted handing the boy a bottle of coke.

"I am much better than alight." he replied taking the top off the bottle. “But thank you."

Tim rolled his eyes but smiled nonetheless as he watched Damian drink his first coke. The boy’s eyes grew wide as he held the coke up in marvel. “What is this?”

"Soda pop." Dick answered as he bean to pour the stew into bowls.

The youngest Robin’s face grew serious. “Mother said I shouldn’t rot my body with this poison.”

Jason reached back for it. “Fine give it to me.”

Damian puled the bottle away form his reach. “I didn’t say I didn’t want it.” He took another small sip.

Jason gave Dick a grin. “Seduction of the innocent.”

Dick handed him a bowl in response. “He was trained to be an assassin, he is anything but innocent.” He handed Tim a bowl. “But yeah, welcome to the dark side Damian.”

Damian gave the coke a satisfied smile. “I think I like the dark side.”

Tim handed Damian a bowl. “Seriously, you’re just figuring that out?”

Dick shoved Tim shooting him a look but Damian was oblivious to the dig. Once they all had a bowl Dick held up a coke and said out loud. “To Robin.” The other three held up their bottles as well and repeated. “To Robin.”

Damian added after a second. “To Batman.”

The four of them answered as one. “To Batman.”

Jason dug through the soup with a spoon. “But seriously, there aren’t any hobos in here right?”

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